A Small Dog

There is a recurring theme in small dog ownership that keeps rearing its head. I believe it’s at the heart of most of the problems we have with small dogs. The theme is this: we tend to confuse our small dogs with children. Many of us say, “Oh, I know he’s just a dog,” while we secretly believe, in our heart of hearts, that our dog is a child.

Then there are those who just come right out and say it, like the person who came into our shop the other day to pick up her small dog. This un-neutered dog responds to the abundance of testosterone coursing through his veins by peeing on every vertical surface he passes. One of the ladies at our shop, tired and exasperated from continually mopping up after this dog, asked the owner why the dog had not been neutered. The owner’s response: “You wouldn’t do that to your child, would you?”

What’s Wrong?

What’s the problem with this? Am I being petty? I don’t think so, because if you look at the behavior problems of small dog-children, you’ll see the disconnect. While people understand and enjoy dogs as children, dogs really don’t understand the role of a child. Sure, they get the part about hugging and kissing, but they don’t understand the rest of the conversation. It’s gibberish to them.

Lost in Translation

Think of it this way. Imagine yourself all alone in another country where you don’t speak the language and you don’t have a feel for the culture. How would you fair in the first hour after you set foot in that land? You would be pretty disoriented. You would rely on your normal habits. By luck, some of the things you would try would be culturally acceptable, but some things would not. In time, through trial and error, you would probably work it out.

Here’s the deal with small dogs treated as children. They are visitors in a foreign country, except they are continually stuck in that first hour after arrival. They don’t get the language, and never will. They don’t get the culture, and never will. They may eventually figure out some of the customs and habits of this strange world, but they will never fully master their environment.

That is why small dogs, treated as children, seem to run amok. That is why they do things that disappoint or frustrate us. They aren’t trying to be bad. They are just doing what they naturally do because nothing else makes sense.

Change is Hard

The solution is hard—very hard. It requires us to discard the lenses that make us see small dogs as children. It’s a sacrifice that many of us are not ready to make because there are so many benefits to being the parent of a small dog. The benefit is all ours.

Evaluate your relationship with your small dog. See if you are:

• Explaining your expectations to your dog in sentences.
• Placing affection ahead of guidance.
• Reacting emotionally, rather than rationally, to your small dog’s misbehavior.
• Referring to yourself as your small dog’s mom or dad.

If you are doing at least two of the items on this list, and your small dog is a model citizen, write and tell me I don’t know what I am talking about. If some or all of your dog’s behavior is driving you nuts, it’s time to re-evaluate your view of your small dog.